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Parents play an important role when it comes to the planning and execution of a wedding and for some brides, a little too much. Over the years, the mother-of-the-bride held very different responsibilities from the duties of today, as more and more couples are becoming independent from their parents. Depending on the economic and living situation of the married-couple-to-be, a mother-of-the-bride could face extreme involvement or have very few things to worry about.
Financial Obligations?
Tradition has significantly changed, where the cost of the wedding and reception is no longer attached to the parents of the bride. Throughout time, the modern bride has reached a level of financial security where she no longer needs the help of her parents to pay for a wedding. The cost of a wedding may also be split between the engaged couple or both sets of parents.
Support
As mother-of-the-bride, she should provide her daughter with unlimited mental and emotional support. Weddings are quite stressful and many unexpected problems could arise, whether the caterer is being difficult or the dressmaker has made a blunder on the bridesmaids' dresses. This is also a common time where arguments arise at the most random times because the upcoming event often breeds tension (for even the most put-together and organized weddings). A mother-of-the-bride should make this moment in time memorable and may have to often remind her daughter how special this time in her life is.
Post Engagement
When preparations are in the beginning stages, it is important to set up a meeting between the engaged couple and the groom's family. This is the time to get acquainted with the rest of the family (if it already hasn't happened), as well as discuss the particulars, such as future plans and who is paying for what. A tentative budget should be set up. Some mother-of-the-brides will host and finance an engagement party for the engaged couple.
Before the Wedding
Choosing suitable attire for the wedding day should be completed and sometimes even coordinated with the mother of the groom. Custom usually states that the mother-of-the-bride should select her dress first, and that the groom's mother should choose a different, yet complimentary style and color. The mother-of-the-bride may contact the local newspaper and place a formal engagement announcement. When the time comes for her daughter to select a bridal gown and accessories, the mother often accompanies her on this special day.
She may also assist in the selection of the bridesmaids' dresses; help establish a guest list; select and order invitations; and choose thank-you cards. Once the invitations arrive, she might help with the addressing and sending out. When the RSVPs start to arrive, the mother-of-the-bride may keep track of acceptances and refusals. The seating plan may also fall under the responsibilities of the mother-of-the-bride. When it comes to the bridal shower, she may host and pay for bridal shower.
Ceremony Preparations
The mother-of-the-bride should dress early so she may offer help to the bride and her bridesmaids. This is especially helpful if any last minute emergencies should arise. Her daughter may start to show signs of anxiousness, nervousness and doubts. Her mother should offer moral support and calm her fears, while helping to get her dressed for the walk down the aisle. In her purse, the mother-of-the-bride should carry tissues, makeup, dental flow, hairpins, and any other knick-knack accessories that a bride may need at the last minute.
Since the excitement of a wedding day may have the bride's mind elsewhere, the mother-of-the-bride should think ahead of time and gather keepsakes she may forget to save after the exchange of vows. This may include bringing home candles, flowers, and extra programs.
Reception
Sometimes, a mother-of-the-bride will act as a host when the reception kicks off. She is also usually the last to leave. As the guests begin to shuffle home, she may collect the gifts, deal with leftovers and other random items, as well as salvage the cake topper.
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